Okay to start, I don't have any enemies.
But let's think in story terms. At school, the thing that is out to get our hero was called the 'antagonist.' Whatever our hero wanted, this guy/force/instinct was going to try to stop him getting it.
Think about a tv detective programme. There's a serial killer on the loose. Even if the police don't know who it is, they get a sense of their character, based on the pattern of things they do. And they start to project more things about this villain, building a fuller picture, from the snippets of story they've got a handle on.
See when people have only got a little information, and even less understanding, they can lay blame and build a whole series of accusations into someone they see as an enemy, where they don't belong. I ran a focus group a few weeks back, in which a young lady was almost violent in her rage against a particularly senior leader in the company. She was banging her fist and everything: 'How DARE he talk to me about peace of mind, when he's cut my pension?!' she demanded to know.
A few minute later, she spoke with affection about some other equally fat cats.
I asked her what the difference was. She wasn't set up or framed or anything. In her own words: 'Oh I know them. I understand them. I know their stories.'
See she's got just enough information about this one guy, who's actually not all that bad, that she's blaming him for everything. We may as well accuse him of causing poverty and cancer and pollution while we're at it.
If she understood him just a little bit better, if she knew some of his stories, like what he did last weekend and why it's important to him, then she'd gain some perspective and insight into what he's actually responsible for, where his values lie, and why he makes the decisions he does.
In his brilliant book Story Robert McKee explains that in any film, you never completely hate the bad guy. There's always something there, just a little bit to like. And you know him just enough to understand him a little bit, to keep you going. Perfect contempt won't work. You need to understand him as a character, even if you choose to dislike him, to keep the story going.
So two things:
1 - Tell enough stories that people know you and what they're getting with you, so you're not some blank unknown quantity that they can shape their fears around
2 - And if you've got somebody that you genuinely think is Out To Get You, then twist it around. They're your baddie. Your story and your vision are strong enough that you've got your own personal antagonist. Get to know them, and appreciate them, and grow stronger from responding well and being true to your values and the challenges they present you. And get on with creating the happier ending, for both of you. Because your story is not in what happens, but in how you respond to it.
-Fin-
